Saturday, December 26, 2009

where are you christmas?

this year's christmas was spent in hawaii, not unlike the past five years or so. i'm pretty much used to spending it sans family, which some people may look at as 'sad', but for me, it has always been more pleasurable to spend it with what friends i have had out here than to go and spend it with my resentful mother...but i digress. this year was just another sign, in a long line of signals from the cosmos that i should leave hawaii. don't get me wrong, i love hawaii, it has been a great place to live, and i feel truly blessed to have had the opportunity to be here for as long as i have, but this year's christmas felt...different. in addition to apparently not having any job karma coming my way, i also have no housing karma-even though over the years i have let countless number of people crash at my place, even if they were people that i didn't know at all. when it comes down to it, if people are really in need, i have no problem helping them out. now that i have been, technically, homeless since the 19th, i have not been able to find a solid place that i can stay at.

i guess i just expect more from people. it's not because i feel entitled, but it's the fact that i feel that they should dip into their compassion for others, especially around the holidays, in a predominantly lds church community...

in light of certain recent events, this year has gone to crap. and i keep telling myself that next year will be better. however, that's what i said last year, and i've tried to keep an optimistic attitude, so it's not a self fulfilling prophecy. so here's hoping that this year will be better than the last...

1 comment:

  1. I'm sure it will be! I think you have nothing but brightness ahead if that's what you make it. 2009 looked like it was totally gonna suck for us, but we made the most of it. I am sure the housing thing too has less to do with LDS people not wanting to put you up and more with people not being alowed to have a husky and a cat at their place, but I could definitely be wrong. I hope not though because I know you are a loved person and you have really been so very generous with EVERYONE I know! At any rate, Jan 16th is going to come and come soon and I need to get some Taylor time in before that happens so let's do lunch, beach, whatever just let me know!

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